Dear FICTION Diary #1- A Man of Iron, A Heart of Gold
Dear Fiction Diary,
I could be off to save the world, but surely, even heroes like me need saving. Cap said I'm stressing myself out, and I should vent my feeling in a 'diary'. It sounds like something Megan would do, but whatever. However stupid Rogers may be, sometimes the things he say work out.
It's been three years since the snap. Funny how quickly things can crumble into dust, never to be seen again. I lost so many people. I lost Peter. The kid. My kid. The Strange Man also went away. That was kinda sad too. But I didn't know the wizard much so... yeah. Oh, yeah, the Quill guy's also gone. You know, Flash Jordan? That should be a reason for celebration. If that guy hadn't messed up everything, we wouldn't be here today.
But anyway. The world keeps spinning, even when it shouldn't. It's loud in my head. Too loud. Nights are the worst. You'd think a genius, billionaire, playboy philanthropist would be able to buy peace and quiet, but apparently not.
Rhodey checks in more than he used to. Pepper pretends like everything's fine, like I'm fine. I'm not. And she knows it. But she still brings me coffee in the morning and kisses my forehead like I'm not five seconds away from cracking.
Yesterday, I almost built a time machine. Almost. But I stopped. Not because I couldn't. Because I was afraid I could.
What if I did it? What if I really could bring them back? What if I failed again? What if the universe just decides to slap me across the face with a different kind of pain?
I don’t know. Maybe Cap's right. Maybe I need to stop pretending I’m made of iron.
But if I stop pretending... who am I then?
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